my dear friend sonadow ch.1

Shadow's POV.

Sonic, I will never forget that name...we were childhood friends, but not to me, I felt something for him. I was 13 and he was 10 at the time, I know what you're thinking...that it's abit of an age difference and he's just a tiny child, every time I thought of him as a boyfriend, him, kissing me...touching me...no one would understand. We both played baseball, only difference, I was in 16u and he was in 10u...before I get any farther let me just say, I was in that league because they didn't have a 14u and I deffinently couldn't have been in 12u. So I was the youngest person on that team, but it wasn't that bad, they all excepted me and treated me like I was they're age,  because I acted like it. But let's get back on topic, every time Sonic had a game or practice I was there, but I had to make up an excuse, that I wanted  to go help out at the practice or that I wanted to watch my cousin play, Silver, he was on the same team as Sonic so they always let me go because they thought I was telling the truth. I could never tell them I liked Sonic like that, they don't like gay people to much, I think they got sucpisious though, but who cares. And another plus about Silver being on the same team as Sonic was that my grandpa coached the team and me and him were very close, so he was always happy to see me out there with my little cousin. I did treat Sonic special though...he was my absolute favorite on the team, I was close to all the little kids on his team but something drew me to Sonic, it's hard to explain. Everytime we saw each other he would run up to me and give me a huge bear hug saying he missed me, I would always blush hugging him back and telling him how I missed him too. I would always act as if I didn't care if he hugged me or not and told me those things but secretly I was praying he wouldn't forget to hug me and tell me bye. We would both have games about 3 times a week so I got to see him almost every night, unless we had games at the same time but at different ball parks, which really sucked. One time we were in a turniment and our fields were across from each other, so I could vagely see him...but atleast he was there. He was the pitcher and Silver was the catcher...they were so short and Sonic was so cute to me. So when I was in the dugout I would always watch his game, well watch him. I was fasinated at how he would move his little hands around the ball and how he looked so determined to strike the other kid out. He was a fantastic pitcher, I swear just as good as mine. I admired Sonic so much. I was the first base men so when I was out on the field I couldn't glance at Sonic's game because I would always make outs and had to keep my head in my game, no matter how bad I wanted to watch the little one. As soon as my games would end I would walk over to Sonic's dugout and wait for him to come in there, when they got 3 outs. We would always smile when our eyes met, he would have a huge grin on and I'd have just a smile. I think it disapointed him sometimes but I would always act cool around him, that was just me. This other kid on the team, kaylee, would always get so jealous when Sonic sat in my lap and we talked. She was a girl, girls could play baseball until they got to 12u, it's weird, I knew she had a crush on me and if her mother wasn't there constantly I would just shoo her away, but I didn't want to get my ass kicked by a mother. So when Sonic wasn't sitting in my lap, like if he was up to bat Kaylee would come and sit in it, she would make me carry her around, bridle style, and let me just tell you, I so wished it was Sonic and not her, I had never carried him like that and would give anything to just hold him like I had to hold Kaylee. She was an annoying little pest and I hated her. One time when I was hugging Sonic we just ended up having our arms wrapped around each other, we were talking and joking until Kaylee walked up, I glanced at Sonic to see him roll his eyes and quietly scoff, I chuckled realizing he hated her just as much as I did. She had her bat and was singing it at her side casually and I wasn't alarmed until she started poking us with it, first me, giving me death glares and then she started poking Sonic, I quickly placed my arm around his shoulder and walked away from her, before my anger took over. Sonic looked up at me and smiled saying "Why'd you do that? She didn't hurt me." I tightened my hold on his shoulder, getting chills hearing him talk to me like he always did, his voice would change when he talked to me, like a comforting tone and I loved it. I soon replied " 'Cause...if she would've hurt you I probably would have killed her, I have to protect you." He giggled wrapping his arms around my waist as we walked, finally he said, "Yeah I know you do..." Sonic's mom was one of the coaches too, her name was Sonja, me and her were very close...she was like family to me. I thought me and him would grow up together and be friends forever, that was just a childs wish. I told myself I would tell him one day, that I would man up and just say it, but I didn't know how he would take it or if he would ever talk to me again, so I kept it to myself. I've never told anyone, and I mean NO ONE...all my friends and family...aren't gay, I didin't know one gay person and I felt so left out, I finally decided to just keep it hidden from anyone. I mean...I must've been bisexual back then...I was still attracted to girls...just not as much as Sonic.

One day at his practice I was talking to Mrs.Sonja and my grandpa, I called him pawpaw, Sonic was practicing pitching in the bullpin. Mrs.Sonja was his catcher, as always so she was in the bullpin too. It was just a rectangular  shape thing of fencing so we could see what they were doing and we could talk to them. Pawpaw and I were leaning against the bullpin talking to Sonja. "So...Sonic really moves up next year? You gonna leave me Sonic?" My pawpaw asked, "Yepp...he's really moving up." Sonja replied. My heart sank, that meant I would probably never see him out there anymore, he wouldn't be on Silver's team and the 12u kids had totally different schedules then me. I quickly butted in "Wait...that won't work...I'll never get to see him..." Sonic stopped pitching and glanced over at me like he usually did, but this time his eyes were sad and didn't have that lovely spark I was used to seeing. My pawpaw smiled and replied "Well, I guess we'll have to make it work...I can take you out here to see him play. How does that sound?" I smiled at him and went to nod but Sonja said "So you're gonna go all the way up to North Carolina just to see Sonic play?" I didn't understand what she meant. "What? What are you talking about?" "You haven't heard? We're moving to North Carolina." Every thing in my mind just went blank, I couldn't comprehend what she was telling me. My pawpaw was the one to ask "When are you guys moving?" "Oh in June...two months from now." I couldn't take it anymore, Sonic wouldn't look at me so I couldn't see how he felt about this and I didn't know how I felt about this either. I quickly walked away, going into the bathrooms knowing no one would be in there. When I went through the door tears rolled down my face, I was sobbing, literally, sobbing.

I spent about 10 minutes in there trying to calm down, when I did I exited the bathrooms and went back over to Sonic's practice. They were on the field now, Sonic on the pitchers mound, Silver behind the plate, they both turned and looked at me, Silver smiled having no idea baout Sonic's move and Sonic...just stared at me, no smile, nothing, I almost started crying again. When pawpaw and Sonja walked off the field for a minute to decide what the team would practice next Silver yelled at me, "Hey Shadow! Sonic wants a hug!" After he said that Sonic jogged off the mound leaving his glove there. when he reached me he threw his arms around my neck, standing on his tippy toes. He burried his head into my chest, just standing there, hugging me, forever. I quickly returned the hug, placing my own arms around his tiny waist. I slowly bent down to his ear and whispered confusingly "What's up Sonic? You already hugged me today." He lifted his head up with a fake smile and replied "I know... but I wanted to hug you again... I like hugging you." I blushed again, leaning my head down even farther so no one could see the pink tint in my cheeks. After he finally let go he went back onto the field so he could continue his practice. After he left me I went and sat on the bleachers to watch him, listening to my ipod touch, wanting to ecsape the world and all my emotions forever.